Author Topic: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.  (Read 150 times)

Offline Mince

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"I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« on: August 06, 2017, 09:19:25 PM »
So what's your favourite pun?

Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #1 on: August 06, 2017, 10:13:42 PM »
Is that a doughnut or a meringue?
I apologise, in advance.

Offline Sandy Buttcheeks

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #2 on: August 07, 2017, 12:37:28 AM »
Is that a doughnut or a meringue?

 ;D ;D ;D

Is this just a Scottish thing?

Offline Diane CBPFC

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #3 on: August 07, 2017, 04:19:26 AM »
Why do cows lie down in the rain?
To keep each udder dry.
People will come from strange lands to hear me speak my words of wisdom. They will ask me the secret of life and I will tell them. Then maybe I'll finish off with a song. The Nomad

Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #4 on: August 07, 2017, 11:16:40 AM »
Is that a doughnut or a meringue?

 ;D ;D ;D

Is this just a Scottish thing?

Naw, you're right - it's a doughnut.
I apologise, in advance.

Offline Max

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #5 on: August 07, 2017, 07:02:39 PM »


A linguistics professor was lecturing to his class one day. "In English," he said, "a double negative forms a positive.
In some languages though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative.

However," he pointed out, "there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative."

A Scottish voice from the back of the room shouts, "Aye, right."

Offline Roger Kettle

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #6 on: August 07, 2017, 07:48:01 PM »
 ;D ;D ;D

Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #7 on: August 07, 2017, 11:15:24 PM »
 ;D ;D ;D
I apologise, in advance.

Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #8 on: August 07, 2017, 11:19:20 PM »
Max, that's actually brilliant! I just read it out loud, with appropriate emphasis. Laughed out loud too. I can't wait to share it, but tragically, I may have to travel the best part of 300 miles to make it worthwhile.
I apologise, in advance.

Offline Mince

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #9 on: August 07, 2017, 11:30:54 PM »
[...] but tragically, I may have to travel the best part of 300 miles to make it worthwhile.

I assume the best part of 300 miles would be that part that is England. Is the remaining worst part of the 300 miles Scotland?

Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #10 on: August 08, 2017, 11:03:04 AM »
As is customary, you couldn't be more wrong.  ;D
I apologise, in advance.

Offline Diamond Lil

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #11 on: August 08, 2017, 11:14:04 AM »
 :D

Offline Sandy Buttcheeks

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #12 on: August 09, 2017, 11:57:46 PM »
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.

Offline Max

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Re: "I can see for miles," said Miles' guide dog.
« Reply #13 on: August 10, 2017, 05:01:13 PM »
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.

So lets all sing along eh?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wr-kn0JG5p4