Author Topic: One-Liners  (Read 1938 times)

Offline Mince

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One-Liners
« on: March 05, 2018, 07:28:04 PM »
1. For as long as I can remember, I've had memories.

2. I’ve started a dating site for chickens just to make hens meet.

3. If you rearrange the letters of postmen, they get really annoyed.

4. Without a doubt, my favorite Robin Williams movie is Mrs Fire.

5. When I walked into my house and discovered that someone had stolen all of my lamps, I was delighted.

6. I apologise for name dropping: the Queen hates it when I do that.

7. I was going to post a time-traveling joke, but you guys didn’t like it.

8. When cartoonists want to decide who's the best, they draw lots.

9. I had a fan installed inside my head and it's blowing my mind.

10. When my friend told me to stop acting like a flamingo I had to put my foot down.

Offline Max

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Re: One-Liners
« Reply #1 on: March 05, 2018, 08:11:23 PM »
Be strong Mincey, somewhere, out there, there's a cure.  :o

Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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  • They call me Tarqs... and other stuff.
Re: One-Liners
« Reply #2 on: March 06, 2018, 02:11:59 PM »
I laughed at four of those, and winced at the rest. No, I'm not going to say which was which.
I apologise, in advance.

Offline Mince

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  • Utter Waste of Time
Re: One-Liners
« Reply #3 on: March 06, 2018, 03:09:51 PM »
I just found out I'm colourblind. The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.

Offline Mince

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  • Utter Waste of Time
Re: One-Liners
« Reply #4 on: March 06, 2018, 03:13:11 PM »
Rick Astley will let you borrow most of his Pixar movies, but he's never gonna give you Up.

Offline Tarquin Thunderthighs lll

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  • Posts: 5823
  • They call me Tarqs... and other stuff.
Re: One-Liners
« Reply #5 on: March 06, 2018, 05:17:49 PM »
One laugh, one wince. 50% strike rate. You're getting there.
I apologise, in advance.

Offline Diane CBPFC

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Re: One-Liners
« Reply #6 on: March 10, 2018, 06:54:14 PM »
#7 was pretty good.  (y)
People will come from strange lands to hear me speak my words of wisdom. They will ask me the secret of life and I will tell them. Then maybe I'll finish off with a song. The Nomad